


The Monster Within

by Laurwen



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Existential Crisis, Hurt Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV), Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV) Devil Reveal, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-25
Updated: 2018-05-25
Packaged: 2019-05-13 15:01:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14751107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laurwen/pseuds/Laurwen
Summary: A little oneshot which I created after the season 3 finale of Lucifer.Lucifer has a "tiny" crisis after the unwanted reveal.





	The Monster Within

“I'm not a monster. I'm not a monster. I'M NOT A MONSTER.” 

He repeated it over and over again in his mind - from a soft whisper to a furious scream. He opened his eyes, but a monstrous face in the mirror looked back at him with a wide grin. "You know what you truly are. You can't hide." It hissed at him, sneered at him while little flames ran over and over again over his face. Lucifer couldn't tolerate its gaze anymore and averted his eyes. "No... it can't be," he whispered desperately while he slipped down to the cold floor. He was too weak to stand anymore. A little rustling sound echoed off the walls. His wings wrapped around his shoulders like a cocoon to protect him. But from what? He couldn't run away. The truth would always find him. Lucifer closed his eyes. He was so tired. 

He could see her gaze again - her shock while realizing the truth. He was still the Devil, after all. The monster parents talked about to their children. “You are not the Devil. Not to me.” These words meant so much a long time ago - now it was just a mockery. Yeah, she only said it because she didn't believe that all these things were really true. 

They hadn't spoken since then. It must be... days... weeks? He didn't know. He had lost all sense of time. The curtains were closed; it was so dark here - a little bit like hell, but not as hot as the deep south. He rested his head on his knees while his arms wrapped around his legs, and rocked forwards and backwards.

His thoughts went back to the moment of the reveal. He didn't know that his Devil face was back, that he looked awful... scary... ugly. Before realizing it, he had been so happy. His Detective... his Chloe was safe. Cain would never ever threaten her life again. And he had this little hope that the near future would be bright. The Detective chose him after all, didn't she? She wanted him, didn't she? She loved him, didn't she?

Tears ran down his face - little red drops which created tiny lakes on the floor of the bathroom. He still wore his ruined suit which was bloody and perforated. His wings blocked the view of the mirror, but he could feel the glaring smile. A cold shiver ran down his spine and to his wings. He ignored the pain in them. They were still dirty from the dried blood and broken - destroyed feathers were everywhere. Lucifer didn't care. He had never really wanted them back and the only use they had was to save his Detective. Now that she was safe, the wings were useless... he was useless. Who would need a monster like him, besides to scare some humans? 

He, Lucifer, was the evil Devil after all ... the true monster. And who could ever really love a monster? He didn't deserve a happy ending.


End file.
